


That's No Moon

by Pearl09



Category: Ant-Man (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Based on a Tumblr Post, Crack, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Gen, How Do I Tag, Legos, Not Canon Compliant
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-21
Updated: 2019-12-21
Packaged: 2021-02-26 06:16:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,704
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21888781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pearl09/pseuds/Pearl09
Summary: Tony reminisces on how Peter created a second moon in the Earth's atmosphere - a giant lego death star.
Relationships: Ned Leeds & Peter Parker, Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Peter Parker & Scott Lang, Peter Parker & Tony Stark
Comments: 8
Kudos: 90





	That's No Moon

**Author's Note:**

  * For [crowkag](https://archiveofourown.org/users/crowkag/gifts).



> I've seen [this tumblr post](https://magical-awesome-kid.tumblr.com/post/185865353692/scott-lang-completely-misunderstanding-peter) around a lot but - for some reason it hit me hard yesterday and I just had to write it. Maybe it's because Crowkag has been sick recently so I wanted to help her feel better? Anyway, thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoy!

Tony takes a long drink of his spiked coffee as he watches the double moon rise from his workshop. He remembers the day the second moon came into existence, and all the consequential headaches it caused. Especially for Pepper.

_~A few weeks ago~_

While Peter is quite possibly one of the few kids to even come close to Tony’s smarts, and he has the advantage of actually having powers, it’s impossible for him to get one over on Tony. Especially in the lab. But he still tries anyway.

“Underoos!” Tony calls, setting his mug back down close to one of the coffee rings on his blueprints as he stands in front of the table. There was no avoiding the coffee rings, and no engineer is going to do _anything_ if their blueprints stay pristine, but it makes Peter feel better if they’re at least all close together and not actually covering the design.

Peter freezes somewhere behind him – he can tell because whatever is in the box he’s holding stops rattling. “Whatcha got there?”

“Some… stuff.”

“Mhmm.”

“Equipment.”

“Mhmm.”

Tony picks up a pencil and spins it between his fingers as he turns around with a disapproving frown on his face. “Is there a reason you need to take that ‘equipment’ out of the lab?”

Peter looks down at him with an embarrassed smile – because of course, he had been trying to sneak out on the ceiling. “Yes?”

“Are you going to tell me?”

“No?”

He sighs and reaches around to pick up his mug again. “Peter, I told you okay with you taking equipment, as long as you bring it back. And it’s all still in one piece. But, last I checked, you need my permission to use it.” He takes a sip of his coffee while pointedly looking at Peter over the rim. “And I’m not giving you permission unless you tell me why you can’t do whatever it is here.”

Peter sighs and climbs down from the ceiling so he can see Tony normally. While Tony appreciates it, being able to look right into Peter’s eyes when they stand face to face only reminds him of how small he is.

“I was going to take them to my house so I can work on this science project with Ned.”

“You can bring Ned here, Pete. Honestly, I’m not that–” He cuts off as Peter shakes his head fervently.

“Bringing Ned here is _not_ a good idea. At least, not right now. He’s a little… obsessed with the Avengers, and I don’t want to push that on anyone if they aren’t prepared. And I want him to be prepared too; otherwise, he might embarrass himself. He does that a lot.”

Tony chuckles and shakes his head. “Does he? Go ahead then, I’m not stopping you. I expect to see that equipment back soon.”

“Of course, Mr. Stark! Thank you.”

Tony waves it off and turns back around, hunching over the blueprints again. He’ll have to remember to let Peter look over these later. 

Once Tony’s sure that enough time has passed for Peter to have left on his way home, he stands again and looks up. “Friday?”

“There was roughly enough equipment and materials in there to make three space-suits, sir.”

He hums thoughtfully, pursing his lips. “What are you up to, Pete?” He mutters. Then, louder, “Keep an eye on him.”

“Yes, sir.”

~~~

Peter remembers the day much differently than Tony. Sure, the sneaking out didn’t go quite as he had planned, but at least he still made it out of the tower with everything he needed.

He doesn’t go to his apartment. Or Ned’s. Or even the school. Because, the real truth is, the equipment isn’t for a school project. Science project? Yes. Lots of fun? _Hopefully_. If everything goes according to plan.

The strange, brown van sitting on the side of the street looks like the last thing Peter would have gone to, but he knocks on the back of the door excitedly anyway. 

“Hey open up! It’s me, Peter!”

The door swings open to reveal Ned, who looks down at Peter with a huge smile on his face. “Peter! Did you get the stuff?”

Peter holds out the box. “Right here! Should be a piece of cake for the three of us.”

Ned takes the box so Peter can climb in, closing and securing the door behind him.

“Hi Mr. Lang!”

“Hey, Peter. Is this everything?” Scott has opened the box and is starting to empty it out, trying to find space in the limited area they have for it all.

“It should be! I hope I didn’t miss anything, or Mr. Stark might grow suspicious.” He rubs the back of his neck and chuckles nervously. “I didn’t exactly make it out of there without him noticing, but at least he still let me leave.”

“That’s okay! At least it was better than my ant plan. I don’t know how the ants would have gotten the equipment past the AI systems in there.”

Peter eyes the lego set sitting in one of the chairs that he and Ned finished a few days ago. “Is this really going to work?”

“Who cares? It’ll be fun! Now, are you two ready to make spacesuits?!”

~~~

“The van has started moving, sir.”

“Has it now?” Tony sighs and runs a hand through his hair. “Well, we know he got in there willingly, so it can’t be a kidnapping. But we also know that neither Ned or Peter can drive yet, much less own a car, so… there’s a third person in the equation.”

“I’m almost done running the license plate.”

“Good. Keep that up, and watch where they go.”

At that moment, the elevator door opens, and the echo of the heels clicking on the floor tells him it’s probably Pepper.

“Are you done those blueprints yet? The board won’t stop asking, Tony. They wanted them in last week.”

He spins around with an apologetic smile on his face. “Hi, honey.”

Pepper rolls her eyes. “You haven’t finished them.”

Tony scoffs. “First of all, I told the board they’d have it at the end of this week, so – that one’s not on me. Second, I’ve been a little busy–”

“Doing what? Designing more suits?”

“I told you I’m not making as many Iron ma–”

“I know.” She smiles softly. “I know. But, designing and making are two separate things, and now there’s a whole other suit thrown into the equation too.”

“What?”

“Oh don’t you give me that look. I know you design suits for Peter all the time, with as fast as he went through some of those old ones. Always making them tougher; more resilient.”

“Well – yes. But that’s not why these blueprints aren’t done. You see, Peter–”

“Hasn’t ripped his new suit yet, so it can wait. I thought you used a special fabric for it anyway, so it wouldn’t rip as often? Just – work on the blueprints, please.” She sets a file down in front of him on the table. “And sign these.”

“But–”

“Please.”

He sighs and rolls his eyes, but he leans over and presses a chaste kiss to her temple. “Okay. I’m signing things. What am I signing over now?”

After Pepper leaves with the signed papers and Tony is left doing hand stretches because of holding the pen for so long, Friday finally speaks out.

“They left the city, sir.”

“What?!” He accidentally knocks his mug over, shattering as soon as it hits the ground and splattering the coffee dregs against the floor. “See, this is why I don’t bring the mugs Peter buys me into the lab. Can we get someone to clean this up?”

Dum-E beeps excitedly and drives away to find a mop and broom.

Tony sighs and sits down in his chair, propping his elbow on the armrest and putting his head in his hand. “How long ago?”

“Half an hour, sir.”

“And why didn’t you tell me?!”

“You were busy. Pepper has overrides so only important Avengers issues interrupt the two of you in the lab.”

Tony mutters under his breath, which might include a few curses. “I’ll have to talk with her about that. Where are they now?”

“I’ve traced the van to an empty park not far from the city, but there are no cameras in their immediate area. There should be a satellite above us soon, and I can look.”

“Okay. Good. Great. What the _hell_ , Peter?” He sighs again. “Did you finish running the plate?”

“The van belongs to an ex-con in California; I’ve already run a search through social media if you would like to look through the photos I’ve gathered.”

“Sure. Pull them up, and then go work on that satellite.”

Tony sits and scrolls through the images, finding nothing on how Peter might know him. He’s from California, for starters. There’s no way… 

“I managed to get a satellite picture of the park, sir.” The image pops up on his screen, and as he zooms in, he sees Peter holding a large, gray ball in his hands. Sure enough, Scott Lang is there too. He was in the last picture he looked at.

“Well, good news, he’s not just with any random idiot.” He frowns and covers his mouth with his hand. “I just don’t know what they’re–”

Suddenly, it all clicks together. Scott, who ha shrinking and growing abilities. Peter taking equipment for spacesuits. The big gray sphere.

“Damn it – Friday! I need a suit!”

“Right away, sir.”

~~~

As Ned and Peter help unload the van, Scott goes over the plan again with them.

“First, we tie the death star to this rocket.”

“Uh-huh.”

“Then, we fire it into the air with one of Peter’s webs attached. And we’re holding it.”

“Mhmm.”

“Once we get high enough, the container with the Pym particles will activate, and the force of the launch will take it out to space.”

“Uh, question?” Ned asks hesitantly. “How do we know it won’t launch us too far or too close to the Earth? Both sound – really bad actually.”

“I calculated it,” Peter says. “It’ll be fine, as long as everything goes to plan.”

Ned nods. “Sweet.”

Scott climbs out of the van with the last of what they need, a huge smile plastered on his face. “Who’s ready to explore the death star?!”

~~~

“Come on, come on, _come on_ ,” Tony mutters to himself, using every last booster he has to get to the park as quickly as possible. Knowing the three kids, they didn’t properly think the whole situation out. While it might seem cool at first, they probably didn’t think very far ahead in their preparations, too focused on the ‘doing’ to worry about the ‘what comes next'.

When he sees the rocket launch into the air, Tony throws his arms in front of him to stop his momentum, forced to watch their bad plan come into play. If he shoots the rocket down, they get hurt. If he goes to stop the rocket himself, they might all get hurt. There’s nothing he can do.

As he watches the rocket take them further and further into the upper atmosphere, he can’t help but cover his faceplate with his hand in exasperation. As soon as the lego set expands thanks to the Pym particles, Tony receives a call.

“Tony, are you seeing this?”

“Yes; Hi Pepper.”

“It’s like – like a second moon! Are we in danger? Should I call Fury?”

“That’s no moon.” Tony chuckles to himself and thinks about how Peter would have laughed at that. It’s a solemn reminder of who is entangled in all this mess to begin with. “And, uh, don’t call Fury. Or maybe – can you see if he has a rocket or something that can meet me up there? I have three idiots to deal with.”

“What? Tony–” She’s cut off as Tony ends the call before rocketing off into space. 

He has to admit, he’s a little impressed. Each floor is just tall enough for a normal-sized person, and he’s never seen lego bricks this big. But, deep down, he’s worried. And a little mad.

“Oh, hi Mr. Stark!” Peter waves from inside one of the floors, giggling. “Were you sucked in by our tractor beam?”

“Yeah, funny, haha, get all your jokes out now, because you’re not going to be happy in a few seconds.”

“Why not?”

“Why not? Peter – I thought I was the irresponsible one!”

“We’re just having fun.” Peter pouts, trying to use it against Tony.

“Fun my ass!” He crosses his arms and glares as Scott and Ned join Peter. “What the hell were the three of you thinking! You’re going to cause a global scare because you decided to blow some legos out of proportion! Why would you even do this?”

Scott sheepishly takes a step forward – well, more like he floats a little closer to Tony, who now has to keep an eye on him to make sure no one accidentally starts floating out into space. “It was my fault.”

“No, not entirely!” Peter interjects, ever the team player. “Mr. Lang asked me if I wanted to shrink down and play in some legos with him; he didn’t realize that’s not what my powers are. Then he offered to make them big, I remembered Ned’s death star… and you know the rest.”

Tony sighs. “A giant lego castle in the middle of an open field or something, I would have tolerated. But this is dangerous! There’s no gravity, no food, nowhere to resupply your oxygen – and how were you planning on getting back home?”

Peter opens his mouth to answer, but then his face falls. “Oh.”

“Yeah, oh. Even if you could get back close enough for gravity to pull you back in again, you would have never survived the fire.” He sighs again, shaking his head. “I’m not going to ream you out any further, only because I know that you are going to get the talking to of your _life_ from Pepper when we get back. And remember, any resulting crises that form from this are on _your_ heads. Now – go ahead and have fun; there should be a ship here shortly.”

Peter smiles once more. “Thank you Mr. Stark!”

~~~

When they eventually land, the three don’t only have a stern talk from Pepper, but a debriefing with Fury, ending with him providing the means for them to shrink it back down to normal size. Scott also receives a call from Dr. Pym, but he lets it go to voicemail so he can listen to the yelling later.

Once the general public gets over the shock and terror of the new object in the Earth’s orbit and then realize, of all things, it’s the _death star_ , there’s a sudden burst of interest in space exploration, and many, _many_ petitions and protests to keep it there after the government announced how it came into being, and the plans to get rid of it.

Now, many scientists are working on using the legos as the skeleton to turn it into a real space station; the lead scientist coming from Wakanda. Now, every day, Tony is reminded of how a stupid, foolish thing has started a new wave of global peace and unity, as _everyone_ wants to be able to go on the death star.

He won’t ever let Peter live this one down. And he won’t let Peter take equipment from the lab again, either.

There’s a call from Peter that interrupts Tony’s dwelling, and he sets the coffee down before answering it.

“What’s happening, Peter?”

“Come on down to the theater, Mr. Stark! Mr. Barnes has _never_ seen Star Wars! He doesn’t know a thing! Do you know how rare that is?! We need to catch him up on the death star too!!”

Tony sighs, a small smile creeping onto his face. “Okay, I’ll be right there. Don’t forget, there’s a meeting with Wakanda tomorrow about lightsabers that you need to be at!”

“I won’t!” He hangs up the phone, presumably to make popcorn.

Tony looks out the window one more time, shaking his head. “What is this world coming to?”

**Author's Note:**

> You can come check me out on [ tumblr](https://pearlll09.tumblr.com/) if you want! It's mostly good omens stuff tbh


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